How Humility Can Save Your Marriage And Relationship


Written by: Omaraye Derek

NLT Bible. 1 Peter 3:6-7
[6]For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do.
[7]In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.

NLT Bible. 1 Peter 5:5
[5]In the same way, you who are younger must accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, dress yourselves in humility as you relate to one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

NLT Bible. Proverbs 18:2. [2]Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions.

NLT Bible. Proverbs 12:15-16
[15]Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.
[16]A fool is quick-tempered, but a wise person stays calm when insulted.

Welcome to this series. May God enrich your marriage with all heavenly blessings. Amen

In this article we shall consider “humility before one another in marriage”

Please quickly go through the verses sited above.

Every day the world bombards you with messages of power, independence and control. However, Jesus tells us the opposite that is, to die to yourself.

Marriage offers a perfect testing ground for humility. Once you are married you cease to live for yourself. Dieing to oneself is applicable to every child of God but marriage proves it all.

There are dangers of considering yourself more important than your partner in marriage. Marriage is all about compromise. If you are not willing to come from your end. Then you will never have a successful marriage.

Let us consider the first verse closely.

Sarah humbled herself and called Abraham her Lord.

That’s mind blowing.

Please, notice that Sarah was not from a poor back ground. She did that on purpose.

In marriage, you look away from your ego. No matter how highly placed you might be. It should all vanished in the sight of your partner

In marriage you don’t consider your age, background, achievement(s) or even paper qualification(s).

It’s a world where nothing exist but love and sacrifices. Sarah did not just call Abraham Lord. It was all bottled up in action. I don’t mean pretentious action.

As a lady you can only be called daughter of Sarah when you humble yourself before your husband.

Quickly the next verse talks about the husband. He is to honour the wife. This is actually a big blow on the pride of a typical African man as the original African man is full of pride, disease cultures, poor mentality and self destructive ideology

That is why our homes are heading to the rocks. We brag over nothing and this inmate ideology is been transferred to our young generation and that’s what is killing families gradually.

Hmm! that’s one of the reasons we’re still struggling in Africa.

In marriage, the man should see his wife as his queen and the woman should see her husband as her Lord.

There are men that respect other women in their office but back at home they are arrogant to their wife.

Is that good?

Please remember that a great hindrance to fellowship in marriage is pride which leads to self confidence, self exaltation and self protecting pride.

Mr. man what kind of person do you want to marry?
A zombie?

There are men that want to have women they can control. If you have zombie in your home as a wife, you will die early because she doesn’t ask questions, she doesn’t say anything and wherever you want the family to go she approves of it.


Hmm!! that’s not marriage.

God told Abraham one day, He said listen to your wife. Humility doesn’t makes you stupid. There’s strength in humility. Only a humble man accept the opinions of others.

Remember your kids and the younger generation is watching you.

Take a look at David’s reaction to the points raised by Abigail. He humbled himself and saved his Dynasty.

My father died because he didn’t listen to his wife. Julius ceaser died because he didn’t obey his wife.

Sometimes women talks senses

Don’t say, I am a fan of the women folks. Now let’s turn the search light on women.

Sometimes I wonder where some of our women got this ideas of running their lives without their husbands.

Don’t think because you are connected you are above your husband.

That’s a mistakes and a great error.

Peter talks about that the ornaments of humility is more beautiful than consmetics. There is no beauty as humility. The word of God says we should wear it. Humility is like a clothing – wear it.

Don’t go into marriage with your bags of ego and pride. The man will be in trouble if he keeps such a wife, and arrogance will show you the door in your marriage.

No matter how beautiful you are, be humble even though your nose stands pointed. Be humble during conversation with your partner, do not dominate the show. Air your view with respect. Know when to talk and when to be quiet.

Remember you are both equal before God.

I can never look down on my wife never!

This is the secret of a successful home. You should not be proud to offer apologies when you make mistakes.

What I have said now is omitted in Africa context.
For men hardly say “I am sorry”
Seriously, I wonder why!

Please, for goodness sake let’s apply the little things that we learned from school. There are people who are living in the city but they have village mentality.

Hmm!! Na Waoooooo

Stay tuned for next episode.

Remember “A good marriage life is possible”.

You can drop your comments and questions on the comment box.


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