Grant Me The Permission To Become

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Written by: Aheybor J. Osaro Like in the movie “three idiots”. Every male child must be an engineer and the female child, a doctor or a nurse. This was the prestige in my community. The day I was born. Dad carried me, and called me an engineer. Relatives and neighbours looked at me, and affirmed the title “Our engineer”. Making me to be left with no choice of my own. For papa is the Vice-chancellor of the best engineering institution in my country and also among the respected prominent engineers in the country. So, I grew up, loving what i hate and cherishing what gives me pain. Dad wouldn’t let go off me. Relatives eyes was on me.
shut your eyes, and think of your tomorrow.
Shut you mouth, and speak less of sorrow.
Take a bold step, and aim forward,
You know your tomorrow. “
At all times, these voices of theirs continuously echoes in my brain. Their thoughts was “they were making me better”. Rather, they were killing me slowly within. Mathematics was made my breakfast. Physics, my lunch. Mathematics again as my dinner, And my appetizer was made physics. I wished they made my choice, the last supper.
I Call him dad! Who couldn’t see my future happiness. I Call them relatives and community! Who is pressuring me with their expectations.
Never wanting to disappoint the expectations of my family and community. I struggled to gain entry into the prestigious school of engineering. I was depressed and dead within,
I smiled and laughed though. For my religion says “obey thy parents, so thy days may be long
I wasn’t even sure of my engineering future, For my passion was to become a photographer. My academic results was below average. So, I struggled for promotion from level 100-400. Due to my 400 level result, I was placed on probation. Ironically this failure was eating me deep inside and I never wanted my dad and relatives to be aware. Not long enough, my father the Vice-Chancellor of the prestigious school knew. Feeling that I’m a failure and a great disappointment to every expectations upon me. My best option to ease the mental stress on myself, was to commit suicide. Which I did. However, it was unsuccessful but I broke twelve bones in my body and was hospitalized for four months. During this period, they came to understand the sole reason behind my suicide attempt. I however regretted my action as my parents, relatives and neighbours felt painful for almost losing me. Then, I made a vow, “not to attempt it again in this life or in the next to come”
When there is life, there is always hope. For life presents us with options but we make the decisions. YOLO… You Only Live Once Never you attempt to take your life because life is a precious gift. Aheybor J. Osaro
They all wished, for my quick recovering and dad was willing to grant me the permission to become what I wanted to be; My father thought going into photography won’t provide me any successful future, As the most earners were engineers and doctors. He was filled with grief for pressurizing me to be an engineer against my wish. God’s willing, I recovered and graduated to be an engineer. To my greatest surprise, father bought me all necessary instruments and materials for photography. He whispered to my ears, “Son, you can be whatever you are passionate for”. He threw his hands round my shoulders and gave me a warm embrace. We both shed tears and all around marvelled with passion. Three years later….. I was among the best creative and innovative wildlife photographers in my continent. Two year before….. I sent a mail to the family especially to my dad Stating, “If I had practiced as an engineer, I would have been the worst in history. Dad, thanks for observing late and for your blessings. I know you are uncertain of my future as a photographer. For now, I am improving my skills and also getting an average income which I believe will get better in the future soonest. Thanks a lot dad for understanding that ones passion should drive professionalism, and never forget to extend my unwavering love and greetings to all.” “Working hard for something we don’t care about is called Stress. Working hard for something we love is called Passion.” -Simon Sinek

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